First Day of Advent

Today's Blessings

Today my whole family joined me at church this morning. The Advent season is very special to me and today was the first day of Advent. I love my family for making the effort to join me in something that they know is important to me. I love you guys!

Family dinner and lighting the Celebration Candle to celebrate the fact that Nanna and Poppa will soon be moving to the neighborhood!!

Lighting the first Advent candle this evening (lots of candle lighting going on today! LOL!) and singing Away in a Manger with my two men.

A cozy fire in the fireplace.

Despite the fact that I burnt the garlic bread horribly- my family ate it, and without so much as a single complaint or smart remark!! Such restraint shown!!! LOL!!

Snuggles with Luke. My snuggle-bug-boy.

Our Celebration Journal

One of my (many) quirks is that I feel an obsessive need to record life's moments. You'd think then that I'd be a huge picture-taker... but no... instead of pictures, I'm a compulsive journal keeper. I have many journals. I've already written about my NYE Journal. Today I'd like to tell you about another journal that I keep. This one is a family journal. We call it our Celebration Journal.

It's a big red journal and in it we record the reason behind every celebration dinner that we have.

Now you should know that, for me, there is no occasion too small to celebrate. Luke changing a diaper size, the first snowfall of the year or the fact that we eliminated one more debt are all valid reasons for a Celebration Dinner!

Usually for celebration dinners we use my Blue Willow dishes that used to belong to my grandma (on my mother's side, and whom I never got the chance to meet). And we usually light our Celebration Candle - which is a crystal hurricane candle holder.

And at some point during the evening I will take the time to record the reason for the celebration in our Celebration Journal.

On New Years Eve or New Years' Day we try and read all of the entries from the year. And it's then that we are reminded again just how truly and utterly blessed we are.

Tomorrow evening we will light the Celebration Candle once more. To celebrate the fact that my parents will soon be moving to my neighborhood!! This is something that we have been praying for, for quite a long time. We are so very blessed!

A Musical Group That Speaks To Me Like No Other...

I was in the mood tonight to just listen to my favorite group of all time... Third Day. There is not a single song that they have recorded that I'm not fond of.

Their sound is Southern-rock (reminiscent of Skynrd, Seger and Rebel Train) but Christian.... and to me they are the 'whole package'.


They have a very "real", down-to-earth sound but yet so full of passion. And the lyrics? Among the most powerful I've ever, ever read/listened to. For example the song Thief (which is one of their most loved songs of all time) was written from the viewpoint of the repentent thief who died on the cross beside Jesus... powerful stuff.


And just in case you've never had the pleasure of listening to Third Day - I've uploaded a selection of some of my favorites on a playlist. And as you listen - try to really take note of the words.... and see if they don't move you as they do me....


Enjoy, my friends!

Celebrating Advent

For me, Christmas starts with the start of the Advent season (the 4 weeks preceding Christmas - this year starting on November 30th). In recent years it has become my very favorite Christmas tradition. Celebrating the Advent seems to be a rarity these days, but I'm convinced that it is needed in today's modern society more than ever, where commercial exploitation seems to be the norm for most Christmas celebrations.

People have all sorts of different Advent customs.... for me, it's a time that I set aside to prepare my heart and set my thoughts on the real meaning of Christmas. I have a few Advent devotional books and story books that I read through each year. And of course Advent wouldn't be Advent for me without the lighting of the Advent candles!!

It's a really soothing time for me amidst the hustle and bustle of the holiday season. A welcome reprieve for me at the end of my hectic days.

This year, I'm anxious for Luke to join me in some of my Advent celebrations. I've purchased a really cute Advent calendar for him with a gorgeous picture of the Nativity Scene (and chocolates behind each window, of course!) He'll also join in the lighting of the candles each evening as well.

Just recently a friend shared her family's custom of lighting the candle each evening in the Advent ring and then they would each take a turn choosing a Christmas Carol to sing. I really like this idea. Not even 2 weeks ago, I had purchased a gorgeously illustrated book with the words and music to Christmas Carols... so this would be a good way to use it. A lovely tradition to start, I'm thinking.

In the evenings during Advent, long after Luke has been tucked into bed, I have my own time of meditation and reflection in my cozy nook in my bedroom.

Peaceful... if only for a few moments!

Snowballs and Meatballs

Snowballs and meatballs - what's the Connection? Luke!

He had meatballs for the first time this week - and they were DEEEEEELISH by the way.. quite easily the best meatballs I've ever had...(note to self: ask dear friend for recipe !).

He also made a snowball for the first time this week.

He has somehow gotten them mixed up and now whenever we go out to play in the snow - he says......

MEATBALLS Momma!!! MEATBALLS!!

Oh Luke - you are a card. There is not a day that goes by, and barely an hour - that you don't make me smile or giggle.

Personal Changes Coming in the New Year

Despite all of the happenings going on around our home lately... there has been a lot of soul searching going on in the past couple of weeks. Over the next little while, I'll be recording here some of my intentions for 2009 and also the reasons behind the changes. When I doubt myself I'd like to be able re-read what I wrote and be reminded WHY I'm doing it!!

One of the first changes I'm going to make is reducing the number of committments that I've taken on. This year I've over-extended myself in terms of committments. There are a number of volunteer positions that I hold, a few of which have taken enormous amounts of my time, energy (and if I'm honest - patience). Giving of my time and resources is extremely important to me. But I've come to realize that I don't have to volunteer on committees or groups to do so. I can pick and choose (together with my family) the ways that we want to give to others. We already have some family projects planned that are charitable in nature - and so we'd like to replace some of my committments with more charitable projects that are fun in nature and involve Luke, John and I as a family.

There are a few reasons why I'll be down-scaling my committments in 2009. But mainly its because the more time I waste with administrative and bureaucratic details, the less time I have for me and my family. For my goals and dreams. And I have some pretty great goals that I'd like to achieve in the next couple of years!

The Kindness of Other's During Life's Trials

Things are understandably hectic in our household lately... and likely will be until December 1st when Yvette's service will take place. It seems like it's been go-go-go for the past couple of weeks with rarely a chance to just sit and absorb all that has happened. I know that once we have the time to do that - it'll be a chance for us all to really start the grieving process. At the moment everything still feels surreal and the busyness gives us a welcome respite from really grieving.

This is the first time that John and I have experienced the loss of someone so very close to us. I know that there will be lots of emotions to work through.

One thing though that I have to say I'm so very thankful for (and blown away by) is the thoughtfulness and hospitality of our friends and family. I don't know how we would have made it without you all.

From the offers of cars, to meals made for us, to Christmas cookies baked and countless other thoughtful gestures - we are just amazed. And so very appreciative to have you all in our lives. Your kind words and even kinder gestures will not soon be forgotten. Saying Thank You seems so inadequate.

Community, old-fashioned hospitality and graciousness are not dead... they're alive and thriving in each of you. Thank you.

Thank you.

Goodbye dear Mother-in-law

Dear Mother-in-law,

I just wanted to write this letter of thanks for the wonderful son you brought into this world so many years ago. As he grew from baby to child to teenager you were there to over see every step, allowing him to find his own way, letting him stumble knowing that you would be there with a loving heart and a helping hand when he needed it. You raised an amazing man Yvette who is the most amazing husband anyone could ever hope for. Now he is a grown man with a little boy of his own, and if Luke turns out to be half the man his father is, know that you helped. And know that you should be proud. You planted the seed of love so many years ago in your son and allowed it to bloom.Thank you so very much for this wonderful man I call my husband, without you and the good Lord our happiness would not be possible. So I thank you both from the bottom of my heart for my dear angel.

Over the years, you and I have had our differences. Goodness gracious we certainly have. But I also want you to know that I've always had an enormous respect for you. You've taught me so much in the 18 years that I've known you. One thing that you've taught me is that nothing is impossible. I'll always remember you telling me that if I want to move a mountain, then I'd be able to - even if it was one shovel at a time.

Something else that I've admired you for was your work ethic, and your ability to look at everything as a challenge worth facing. Remember the scarf you knitted for me? Such an intricate pattern that you did, just by looking at a scarf that I already had and loved. The scarf that you made for me is something that I will always treasure and every winter it's the one that I reach for first. For such a tiny, tiny woman - you do have big shoes to fill.

I will always regret that Luke won't grow up knowing his Grandma. Just as you've taught John so much, I know that you would have taught Luke so much too. But know that you will live on in our lives. We will share stories about you to Luke so that he grows up feeling as though he's known you his whole life. Yes - we'll even tell him some of the crazier stories too: Shang-ri-la!! Trips to Florida, the many card games, boating to Petrie Island, sitting out on the deck at le Riviere Blanche, helping you dig out that last pool in the pouring rain, belting out Kenny Roger's songs to stay awake,and Christmas dinners. Yes, there are many, many wonderful memories I have that I will cherish forever and will share with Luke. And of course John will have many millions more to add.

From the bottom of my heart Yvette - I thank you for raising such a truly amazing man and I thank you for all that you've given me and all that you taught me. I'm so very fortunate to have had you in my life. I vow to continue to love and support your son and grandson for all the rest of my days. I'll take good care of them for you Yvette.

I know that you are with the Lord now and if heaven for you is anything like my imagination - you will have the most beautiful gardens to enjoy and oceanviews and a dog by your side... and you'll be dancing once more. I'll look foward to seeing you in Heaven in the future. Goodbye Yvette. I love you.

Love always,

Your daughter in law

Trace

Mothering... on par with Digging Ditches?

With John at the hospital most evenings to be with his mom during her last days.... and with me making major cutbacks on my internet time, I've actually had some time in the evenings to reread a book that has had a major impact on me as a mother. It's called A Mother's Heart: A look at values, vision and character for the Christian Mother, by Jean Fleming. At under 200 pages, it's a relatively quick read - but it packs a punch in those 197 pages... I find myself highlighting sentences and paragraphs in just about every chapter.

One chapter that really spoke to me is the chapter called God's Part, My Part. The author starts off by talking about God's part- about how, really, our best efforts are in vain unless the Lord is working along with us.

"I can read everything written on child raising, closely supervise their activities, develop meaningful dialogue, and stay up late worrying - and still miss the target. I can toil and strive to the point of exhaustion, but unless God works, my best efforts will be worthless. We can take them to church, but we can't make them worship. We can require Bible reading, but we can't make them enjoy doing it. We can provide an example, but we can't guarantee they will follow in our steps.... Something spiritual happens in a child's life because God has done something" .

So as a mom - am I totally off the hook for Luke's spiritual education? Seeing as how all of my best efforts are in vain anyways. On the contrary... I have MUCH labor to do. God wants us to partner with Him as He works in our children's lives. The author illustrates this beautifully with the the bible story of King Joram of Israel in II Kings 3.

King Joram was leading his army against King Mesha of Moab, but after days of marching through the desert they faced a fatal problem - they had no water. They cried out for the man of God to give them guidance, and Elisha , God's prophet passed along a message to them from God to "Make this valley full of ditches."

So Joram's men were given a back-breaking, thankless, unbelievably difficult job of digging ditches in the middle of the desert. This was their part, unromantic as it was, but they became part of a miracle. In the morning, the ditches were full of life-giving water. The army was refreshed, and their enemy was defeated.

"Mothering is like ditch-digging. We can dig the ditches, but we cannot fill them with water. We can teach our children about God, live the Christian life before them, pray for them, and surround them with those who love and serve God. But only God can bring them spiritual life. God doesn't need our help, but He...invites us to co-labor with Him."

I wonder what would have happened if Joram's men had decided that it wasn't important enough to dig the ditches. If they had decided that it was really ALL up to God to do his miracle. What if they had decided that their efforts were really not needed or not important enough? What if they had not done 'their part'??

Learning more about MY part as a mother is a theme that seems to be circling me lately. A while ago I was stressed out about Luke's eating habits - or lack of eating habits. I kept trying to do MORE to get him to eat his meals, his veggies and fruits. I felt helpless because while I could prepare the most nutritious meals and make sure they were chock-ful of nutrients, I could NOT make him eat.

I'm starting to realize that I simply need to perservere in doing MY part - whether that means sneaking pureed vegetables into his meals or taking the time each evening to read him his bible stories and pray over him. And I need to trust.... God will do His part.

You'll need to excuse me now... I see a few ditches that need digging!

Life With Luke - Memorable Conversations

Conversation during Luke's bathtime the other night as I was getting ready to wash his hair:

Luke: "Momma, Poop!!"
Momma: "Luke do you have to go poo on the potty?"
Luke: (shaking his head vigorously) "NO, NO momma! no poo. "
Momma: "Okay - then what are you trying to tell me?"
Luke: (Pointing to the shampoo bottle that's in my hand) " Yuck!"
Momma: "Why are you calling this yuck?"
Luke: "Dat's Poop!!"
Momma (finally cluing in and having a hard time answering due to laughing so hard): "No Honeybear, this is not poop, it's SHAMPOO. It's soap for your hair. Not poop Okay?"
Luke: "Ooooooooohhhhhh!"

A Return to Blogging/Journaling

But with a few changes.

1) This blog is strictly for me, my family and a few select loved ones. I'll no longer write for an audience. This is something that contributed to my extended blogging-break. Trying to come up with interesting and captivating posts became a huge bother and took up precious time. If I want to make a quick post on some silly little thing that Luke is doing - I want to be able to take the 2 seconds to do so and not worry about whether a) it is interesting or witty enough and b) will I offend anyone or c) will someone see it as an opportunity to re-educate me on my parenting style.

This blog will be to record life's moments, the remarkable ones and the not-so-remarkable ones, the BIG moments and the little moments. I'll use the content of this blog to compile a yearly book (created through Blurb). Because I'll be writing about personal events and happenings... I'd kinda like to keep my readership on the smaller side. I won't make the blog private... so I realize that there will some readers who just happen to stumble across my little on-line journal, and that's okay.... but I won't be inviting everybody and anybody to view.

2) Because I won't write for an audience or to attract readers - I can and will write about whatever I like. No apologies for the fact that my faith is important to me and that much about what I write is done through the filter of a practicing Christian. And if I want to write about what we ate for breakfast for 5 days in a row.... well it'll be boring... but it'll be ME. Seriously though I will try never to write about my breakfasts for more than 2 days in a row... LOL!!

3) I will try to keep the focus of this blog on the POSITIVE side...in other words, I'll try and keep the venting to a minimum.

4) As a wise and dear friend recently suggested, my blogging will happen within the daily allottment of time that I've allowed myself for internet use, not in addition to! Internet surfing is my addiction and I need to make sure it's not happening at the expense of more important usage of my time. I want this blog to RECORD my family memories.. I don't want it to REPLACE them!! If I don't blog for a week or two -so be it... :) No pressures or expectations...

Of course I AM a woman and am therefore entitled to change my mind about any of these points at the drop of a hat!