Saturday, December 26, 2009

Feeling Blessed and Just a Wee Bit Nostalgic...

We just came home today from a wonderful Christmas celebration at my sister's place.  I had such a great time, watching my son interacting with his two cousins... he just ADORES them... I know that for the next couple of weeks, he'll be talking about Mackenzie and Curtis every chance he gets...

After supper, the kids played and watched a movie while the adults played Quiddler.  If you have not yet played this game, you really ought to... it's a riot!  And I ALMOST beat my brother-in-law too!  This game is definitely one that we'll be purchasing.  There is something about the winter-time that speaks of endless rounds of board and card games!

It was a delightful day spent with the people I love the very most in this world.

But I've also been feeling nostalgic.  The other day I brought out my mother in law's sewing machine, and when I opened the lid, it smelled like her... and just like that, the tears came.

I won't lie, my mother in law was a very, very hard woman to get along with - she especially made it difficult for other women to get close to her (which she never denied).  And so over the 20 years that I knew her, we definitely had our "moments".... but there were also many, many, many wonderful memories too.   I was a very young woman when I first met her, and in so many ways - the woman I am today is because of the many, many things she taught me.

This past year was the first year we spent without her.  And its been hard. And based on how hard it's been for me,  I can only imagine how difficult it must be for John.  As is his way, he rarely talks about it, but I can tell its been very hard on him. And I can tell  how much he's thinking of her during this Christmas season too.

The other day I used her china for our Christmas Day meal, and when I caught his eye across the dinner table, I knew he was pleased, but hurting at the same time.  I know that he's thinking of the many special dinners we at at his mother's table with those beautiful dishes.  I wish though, that I had remembered to pick up some Cream of Celery soup (an Yvette Christmas tradition!) to serve out of the china soup tureen!

Tonight, I'm sipping one of my all time favorite tea's:  White Tea with  Honeysuckle, (which I don't drink everyday due to its high cost), and it also brings back a flood of memories -evenings spent sitting on our dock on the river that we used to share with Yvette.  She with her glass of wine, me with my white tea. 

If only I had known how fleeting those precious days really were... at the time, it seemed like they would last forever and ever....

And so I feel blessed beyond belief this Christmas season, because I was able to spend it with my family - the people I love so very much. 

But I also feel nostalgic for the loved ones that I'm not able to spend time with...

Time truly does pass by in the blink of an eye.... doesn't it?

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